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The Package Torrent

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Original Title: The Package

Genge: Action,Crime,Thriller

All Tommy Wick has to do is deliver a "Package" to a rival crime lord, nicknamed 'The German'. It seems like a routine job, until another gang tries to hijack the precious cargo and Tommy has to fight every inch of the way to deliver it safely. The problem is, the "Package" isn't what Tommy was led to believe, and now he's in even deeper than he ever thought possible.
A courier for a local crime lord must deliver a mysterious package while being chased by a horde of unusual gangsters.
This is a direct to video movie with Dolph Lundgren so it is fair to say that my expectations where not really that high. Nevertheless, I do like action movies and I do have a faiblesse for Dolph Lundgren. If nothing else we share the same country of birth. So I sat down to watch this movie yesterday.

I have to say that I was surprised. This movie is surprisingly good. Compared to the average direct to video action-flick it is very good indeed. Both Steve Austin and Dolph Lundgren are great as the tough silent gun-slinging hard-hitting bad guys. Yes both of them are really bad guys although one of them not so much and the other one so very much. I really liked them walking through the movie leaving a trail of surprised, knocked out or dead, mostly dead actually, people.

The story is not really that bad and it has somewhat of a twist to it even though that twist is fairly easily guessed once you are a bit into the movie. There are plenty of action using both fists and guns. I felt it was pretty well done. A wee bit stupid and illogical at times of course but nothing that ruined the enjoyment. The movie moves at a brisk pace yet there are enough material in between to tie the action together in a logical (logical for a direct to video action movie of course) way.

Dolph Lundgren have never exactly been an actor who would win any awards for his character portrayal or actual acting performance. I have to say that in this movie he is doing a god job of the role though. "The German" is not just a dumb thug that muscled himself to the top. I quite liked Steve Austin as well. Dolph and Steve are the ones that carries the movie. The rest are mostly props.

I would say that this is a classical "boys" movie with two classical macho heroes. No silly attempts to put some comedy into it with juvenile jokes. No heroine to save. Just the guys slugging it out. Well, of course there is the obligatory sex-appeal female in the movie but she is one of the bad guys so, not surprisingly she is not around for the grand finale.

Bottom line: this is a fun classical action movie and I definitely enjoyed it. I have to wonder whether The Package (not to be confused with the feature-length film by the same name produced about twenty years earlier) was directed by an "artiste" whose area of specialization is pornography. I say this because the cartoonishness of the characters and the general stupidity of the dialogue and plot, conjoined with the stereotypical and wooden acting, typically come together in the lowest of all low-budget genres: cheap pornography. When I saw these stats, I became even more convinced that the director usually does porn:

Opening Weekend: $1,095 (USA) (15 February 2013) Gross: $1,277 (USA) (15 February 2013)

Seriously? How can these numbers possibly be correct? The actors all volunteered for their roles? Maybe because they are all porn stars and were hoping to break into mainstream Hollywood, if only someone in the business had the opportunity to see them in all their glory on the big screen?

Well, anyway, whatever the explanation, this attempt at a movie is a very low-brow, minimal intelligence production which aspires to be a high-energy action flick but fails. Just bad. In fact, on reflection, I should probably change my rating from 2 to 1. Done.

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